Things change, get over it!

My hubby and I had a great life in Kansas City.  I lived there for six years before we were married, and by the time we moved, I'd spend eleven years of my life there, and he'd spent about five.  We lived in a roomy two bedroom apartment in a nice suburb.  There were definitely things that annoyed me about our apartment, but I really came to think of it as home.  Not only did we have a nice home, but we had good friends, and a great church too.  I also had a wonderful job.  Life was comfortable; it was good.

When we decided to move, I knew the hardest part about it would be leaving behind my church and friends.  They had seen me through so much!  When I first came to KC, I was a rebellious and stubborn eighteen year old.  My church saw me through my tumultuous college years, my marriage, and the birth of my first child.  It just felt so wrong to leave so soon after she had come into the world.  However, I knew that God's leading in my life often meant removing me from my comfort zone and that obedience was never short of blessing.

This past weekend, we returned for the first time.  We were brought there to celebrate the wedding of some church friends.  We had a wonderful time.  Everywhere we went, we saw friends and loved ones.  We enjoyed catching up and showing off our beautiful daughter.  But in spite of this, I had this looming sadness.  As I sat in church on Sunday morning, everything was so familiar, but so different.  I felt as though everything was different, and we were different; I felt that things had changed.  This feeling of change was even more pronounced when the friends we were staying with left to travel home to Central Kansas.  I found myself crying!  I couldn't believe it.  This trip that I had longed for months to take had turned me into an emotional mess.  The problem?  Things change.

My husband and I had moved on.  And that's okay.  I think that was the hardest thing for me to accept.  The trip "home" was good because for months I'd been longing to be back, and now that I have been, I see that even if I was there things would be different.  Friends have moved, seasons have changed, babies have been born, people have grown busy with new challenges...things change.  Coming to this realization made coming home to Austin much easier.  I was reminded that I cannot continue looking toward the past.  God has asked me to take steps of faith forward as I trust and follow Him toward my future.  So even though I might long to be with old friends, it's okay to have new friends.  Things change; I really just need to get over it!