When you become a mom, everyone gives you advice. Sometimes it's solicited, but mostly it's not. I'd say about 20% of the advice I received was both useful and asked for. You moms out there know exactly what I mean. Everyone has an opinion. "Nurse your baby for at least a year." "Put your baby on formula; it's more filling." "Feed them solids at four months." "Feed them solids at six months." "Never leave your baby alone!" And the list goes on and on.
As a mom, I'm discovering that there are times when advice is gladly received. There are times when I'm at my wits end, and I'm so thankful that someone has an answer (or at least thinks they do) and are willing to share it with me. There were times as a new mom, that I would post a question on Facebook and eagerly await advice from fellow moms with more experience. Their advice literally saved me, on more than one occasion.
In spite of this, I find that there are things that you just don't get into with other moms. I personally don't want advice on these items, and I also feel like I should just keep my mouth shut when talking about them to other moms. Does anyone else know what I mean? Let me give you a "for instance." Never give advice to a mom on an item that relates to the safety of the child. Believe me...it's already her first priority. For example, when to turn your baby forward facing. So many people have an opinion on this one! I do as well...and NO I will not give it! :) One time, while in IHOP, I had given Juliet a straw to chew on. A woman in the booth behind me saw her and turned around to tell me that I needed to take it away from her because she could cut her mouth with it. I know she was just trying to help, but it made me angry. Here's another no-no...don't tell a mom whether or not she should breast or bottle-feed. I've found that no matter what a mom chooses, it's a very personal decision, and no one wants someone to tell them they've made the wrong one. Another hot item issue is vaccination. Don't tell a mom she should or shouldn't vaccinate! Again, I find this is a very personal decision between mom, dad, and pediatrician, and everyone has a strong opinion on it.
I know I'm easily irritated. It's a flaw of mine, and I'm constantly having to check myself. However, I don't believe this annoyance with unsolicited "mom advice" is specific to just me! How about it moms? Anyone else feel the same way? I guess when it gets down to it, God gave us each our own child(ren) to raise. While advice can be and sometimes is valuable, I also think that I need to respect other moms who choose to do things differently, and visa versa. After all, they know their babies best. Like me, they haven't made their decisions lightly. They take their baby's care very seriously, just like I do. So I will bite my tongue, both in giving advice and receiving it, or at least I'll try! I'll let Ephesians 4:29 be my guide!
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